Obama’s at the parade today…a Hawaiian marching band goes by…and what does our new Hawaiian Shark God do?
Mahalo, baby. Even Bill Clinton couldn’t pull that one off.
We have met the president, and he is Lono.

Well, it seems there’s an award for blogs–there’s an award for everything–and Mr. Robert Hicks over at Art Scatter has been so kind to recognize splattworks for…well…because he likes us. Which is very gracious indeed and greatly appreciated those of us toiling endlessly in the splattworks quarry. I shall allow our extensive staff to take a five-minute champagne break before I put them back to work dragging boulders to the top of the hill only to watch them roll back again.
Seriously, it’s nice enough that you folks read splattworks from time to time. It’s even nicer that Bob likes the blog enough to recognize it.
There are, however, a few rules involved in accepting the award. To wit:
1) Accept the award and post it on your blog together with the name of the person that granted the award and his or her blog link.
2) Pass the award on to another 15 blogs you feel should receive said recognition.
3) Contact the awardees to let them know they too are among the order of Premios Dardo.
Not sure what happens if you break the chain, but I’m certainly not going to risk the consequences (or lose the chance to recognize blogs I appreciate). My Premios Dardo nominees follow below.) Congratulations to all of them.
Steve
Adam Szymkowicz
Blogsite Theater
Fight To Survive
Gasp!
LitDept
Mr. Excitement News
On Theatre and Politics – Matthew Freeman
Owl Farm Blog
Paper Fort
Puzzlewit
the constant creator
The Gospel According to Marc
Trish and Harold’s Weblog
UbuWeb
Visible Soul

Andrew Wyeth, aged 91, died in his sleep this morning. Which I think is as much as any of us can ask for. Here’s a link to the story:
Andrew Wyeth, American Painter, Dies At 91
There’s kind of a remarkable quote from Wyeth hiding in the middle of the story. It goes:
Much of Wyeth’s work had a melancholy feel _ aging people and brown, dead plants _ but he chose to describe his work as “thoughtful.”
“I do an awful lot of thinking and dreaming about things in the past and the future _ the timelessness of the rocks and the hills _ all the people who have existed there,” he once said. “I prefer winter and fall, when you feel the bone structure in the landscape _ the loneliness of it _ the dead feeling of winter. Something waits beneath it; the whole story doesn’t show.
“I think anything like that _ which is contemplative, silent, shows a person alone _ people always feel is sad. Is it because we’ve lost the art of being alone?”
Hopper and Wyeth, in my mind, seem interconnected…both painters of empty spaces, time, and solitude, one of the city, the other of the country. Now, in the mind’s eye, one sees “Christina’s World”…but there’s no figure in the foreground. Just the hill, the house in the distance, and a space where the grass has been flattened.
My friend Mead Hunter recently had a traumatic experience with one of those which-celeb-do-you-look like sites; so he came upon the brilliant idea of putting forth his own doppelganger (which worked pretty good).
To wit, here’s my contribution to the Separated at Birth concept.
S
P.S.: A friend recently sent me two refrigerator magnets, one of the Dali Lama and one of Hunter S. Thompson, and the resemblance is eerie.
P.S.S.: To correct the perceptions of at least one wag, the figure pictured on the left is not Charles Manson; it’s Warren Beatty in “McCabe and Mrs. Miller”
Portland is about to launch an inaugration of its own: the Fertile Ground City-Wide Festival of New Work. From January 23rd to February 1st, theatres all over Portland have committed to staging new plays, from full productions to concert readings. It’s kind of like a South-by-Southwest music festival but for theatre, where you can buy a pass and theatre-hop for a couple weeks. Or you can by a button and get into shows at a discount. (You can also just buy tickets regularly, of course.) It’s a grand experiment, and the Portland theatre community, especially playwrights, hope it’s a smashing success that becomes an ongoing, annual event. No matter how it turns out, it’s great to see theatre companies take a chance on something new. For more info, go to Fertile Ground. Special thanks to Tricia Pancio (there’s imp herself, above right) for being the little-engine-that-could get this thing going. She’s worked her ass off, and Portland theatre community (and the whole city) owe her a big round of applause.
And…yes: I’ll have something in the festival. PlayGroup, the writers group I belong to at Portland Center Stage will present….
Open City by Althea Hukari, Shelly Lipkin, Ellen Margolis, Steve Patterson, Andrea Stolowitz, Patrick Wohlmut, Nick Zagone, and Matthew B. Zrebski
Portland Center Stage Playgroup
Festival Dates: Feb 2 at 7:30 pm
For this group show created by PlayGroup (whose previous escapades include The Clearing, Frenching the Bones and Ten Tiny Playlets) and directed by Matt Zrebski, each playwright pulled a Portland location and a cast size out of hat, then went to work on a short play inspired by those circumstances. The result, presented in rehearsed concert form, is a kaleidoscopic vision of the Rose City that adds up to a town we all recognize.
Venue: Main Stage, Gerding Theater at the Armory (128 NW 11th Ave)
And the fabulous Gary Garrison, Executive Director of Creative Affairs for the Dramatists Guild, will be visiting our fair city on Saturday 31, 2008, speaking at at Portland Center Stage’s Ellen Bye Studio Theater from 1:30-3:00 PM about all things playwright, followed by a town hall discussion about playwriting in Portland and Oregon in general.
More to come on that as well, but it’s a sign that (a) the Fertile Ground Festival is going to be one hell of a special event; and (b) Portland’s playwriting community is beginning to be recognized beyond the borders of Multnomah County.
As Hunter Thompson would say: good craziness.
So Sam Shepard…our Sam Shepard…got himself busted for DUI the other night (you would think playwrights should be afforded special dispensation…Dramatists Guild, let’s get cracking); but the details of the story are…well….
It’s like this.
So Sam, see, he was headed back home to Kentucky. Leaving Minnesota. Minneapolis. And, you know, that’s a drive. So he stops off in Bloomington. There’s this bar there he knows, Fat Jack’s, and maybe, who knows, he runs into somebody who knows horses or something. Anyway, it’s around 2:00 AM, so we can pretty much assume he rode ‘er out to closing. And he’s driving along, some place called Normal, Illinois. No really. And it’s like a 30 mph zone, big deal, 2:00 in the morning, and they pop him for going 46. I mean, shit. Who wouldn’t be pushing it a little to get the hell out of Normal?
So they do the Breathalyzer, the whole thing, and it says double the legal. But we’re talking Sam Shepard here, so, you know, the legal’s kind of under the baseline, if you know what I’m sayin’. What the hell. He says he’s sorry, posts bond, and disappears into the wilds of Kentucky. Thank you very much.
It’s not good. No, it’s not good at all. But still. You know…fuck Normal.

…when you bounce one of my plays? I’m just sayin’. And I still got a case full of black candles and a mayonnaise jar full of goofer dust sitting on the shelf. So, you know…think about it.
Maybe that’s why Dr. John calls it “trajic majic.”
Seriously: good theatre, bad times.
S
————–
Magic Theatre Must Raise $110,000 By Friday:
Please Help Magic Reach Its $350,000 Goal
Please donate now to save this treasure of American Theatre
https://server15.lfchosting.com/pursued/magic/pages/donate_form.shtml
San Francisco’s nationally acclaimed new plays theatre, MAGIC THEATRE, has raised $240,000 since its initial appeal seven days ago. With the funds raised, we began rehearsals for our next production—Tough Titty by Oni Faida Lampley—slated for previews beginning January 24th. Our staff, furloughed for two weeks, is back at work with pay. In order to continue the 43rd season beyond Tough Titty and stay open, MAGIC must raise a total of $350,000 by January 9, 2009. The funds will allow us to retain staff, continue the season, and remain responsible to our creditors.
In a world where more and more theaters are eliminating the challenging and risky work of mounting new plays altogether, please help us fulfill our commitment to new work. We’re $110,000 short of our goal. You can make a difference. Please donate now.
Our core value of risk over commercial gain makes MAGIC a challenging endeavor in any economy, and going forward, MAGIC is committed to a new model of financial stability for a new world—without compromising our mission. Today however, MAGIC’s accumulated debt of $600,000, combined with sharp declines in earned and contributed revenue due to the global economy, place us in imminent peril of shutting our doors in March.
Pulitzer Prize winning playwright Paula Vogel explains the importance of Magic’s mission in this letter of support. Please click here to read A Message from Paula Vogel.
For 42 years, San Francisco ‘s MAGIC THEATRE has been central to the cultural life of the Bay Area and beyond, giving life to some of the most important, diverse, and powerful voices of contemporary American artists, including four Pulitzer Prize winners. From its humble beginnings in a Berkeley bar, MAGIC has emerged as one of the crown jewels of American Theatre. For those of you who have sent us money, large amounts and small, we are grateful. If you have waited, please donate now.
In an attempt to close the gap between MAGIC’s expenses and revenue lost as a result of the recession, the Board, in concert with the staff, raised additional funds and cut the $2 million budget by over $300,000. The closing of MAGIC THEATRE would be a great loss for artists and audiences here and across the country. The second largest theatre in San Francisco , MAGIC employs 200 artists annually and touches the lives of tens of thousands of people. We need to keep our artists and our work on the stage!
Artistically, MAGIC is thriving, building upon its rich legacy under the artistic direction of Loretta Greco, who joined the theatre last spring. The critical success of the first two productions of this season demonstrate the rigor to which MAGIC adheres in each aspect of new play production—and the hoped for excitement, awe, and wonder that come from watching great art play out for audiences.
Save the Magic video
We need your help to raise $110,000 by January 9, 2009. Please help us keep our doors open by making a donation today of $15.00 or more. Please give whatever you can to save MAGIC THEATRE. No amount is too small or too large. Each of you can make a difference.
Please share this message widely with your friends and colleagues.
DONATE NOW ONLINE
https://server15.lfchosting.com/pursued/magic/pages/donate_form.shtml
OR MAIL US A CHECK:
MAGIC THEATRE
Development Department
Building D, Fort Mason Center
San Francisco , CA 94123
Thank you for your support. Your contribution is fully tax-deductible as allowed by law. Magic Theatre’s Federal Tax ID number is 94-1733420.
magictheatre.org
Some New York dude no one outside of New York has ever heard of has dubbed snark “wrong.” Uh oh. I guess it’s time to take down the tent pole. And Patrick, you are so over. (And at such a tender age.)
It’s a sad day. But who knew?
S